Hi, it’s me.
I’m the problem, it's me.
The moment Taylor released her new songs, this phrase never left her mind. It was on repeat.
Every second, minute, and hour of her day.
Exactly today, she realized how problematic she is. It’s always her that makes everything collapse. She was the reason why everything seems to be unstable, because she herself is not stable in the first place.
That’s fine. Being unstable. As long as you’re not causing any collateral damage. Not until he came. The birth of the October trauma. She was sunshine, and he was the midnight rain. She never failed to bring sunshine to his gloomy vibes. Perhaps, it was his reason why he fell in love (according to him) with her.
The eighteen year old hernever had the chance to think about the downfall of their set-up. She thought, as long they like each other, it suffices for everything. Little did she know, whilst imagining those rainbow-like fantasy moments, he was suffering under the heavy rain. Day by day, it caused a large scar, no treatment can heal.
It was there.
Years passed by, another October came. And a different version of him. He was sunshine, she was the midnight rain. He shines her with amazing goofy talks and he gets to open her again. After sometime, the thunder above her head slowly leaves, it was later that she realized that the same thunder she had brought to the situation had passed on him.
She was just waiting for the thunder to die down, but she knows it’ll never happen.
She was at peace during Octobers. They were the ones who came and changed the world. Yet, it was indeed problematic in the first place. She had issues, and it reflected in the way she converse. But let us not forget how problematic these people are too.
The only focus is her.
This will likely continue to happen, not until she admits that she is the problem.
When this day came, I cannot tell you if she is still here. Or maybe not.
Comments